Wednesday, 26 June 2013

I'm so hungry!

For some reason there's been no bread for the past few days. And now it's hotter, the fruit is all warm and mushy. So I've had to have a mushy pear for breakfast every day and now I'm starving! It's 2.15pm and they're still happily swimming round the pool. FEED ME.

I can't even go out and buy food because they've just announced that as well as looking after the children alllll morning I also have to do English with the older girl all afternoon. I want to go and buy nice food, fro-yo, pick'n'mix and take some photos. But no. Grumpy children it is.

I don't know if I'll have time to do anything. As well as the above, I want to buy some alcohol, print off my boarding pass and have another beach trip but by the sounds of it I'm working pretty much all of the last 2 and a half days I'm here.

Get me home.


Saturday, 22 June 2013

Police, hospitals, visits and home

*I started writing this days ago, but haven't got round to finishing it, doing to do a whole week in one post...

So last time I wrote, I was thinking about baked beans and pesto. Neither of these things made it to my mouth :( although I did buy some pasta sauce which satisfied my need for flavour and set me up nicely for Friday nights adventures.

I met up with a Polish au pair by the church in the town and then we headed to this nice beach front bar where we met the others. It was a massive mix of people, young and old from all over, America, Canada, Germany, Morocco, Poland, Wales, Scotland and England. There was a guy there from 20 minutes from where I live in England. Small world. Me and G (the Polish girl) had a jug of sangria, love the stuff. After everyone had had a few drinks we went to the main gay pride area where Kitty from X factor was performing. As you probably guessed, she wasn't so good. The atmosphere was so good though!

We went on to "Sin Street" and went to this weird old bar which I didn't rate much but we had a couple of drinks. This crazy 50 year old Canadian woman we were with was literally pouncing on any man she could find. Pretty gross really. After this point, things get a little hazy. I have to remember that Spanish measures are way bigger than what we have in England! We all were chatting, dancing, having a good time. We went on to this tiny club and I made friends with a drag queen. G wanted to go somewhere else, I thought she could do with going home so we left the others and headed back down the main street. We stopped and had broken conversations with people in the street, bought more drinks and danced in a bar. At one point I was getting swung round the dance floor by this creepy little man. Lovely. As we left the bar, G was suddenly REALLY drunk and I was practically carrying her down the street. These two guys offered to help and I drunkenly thought it was a good idea and we stumbled down to the beach. I REALLY needed the loo so wandered off with one of the guys speaking really bad Spanish, went to the nearest bar and practically ran back to G. When I got back this man beckoned me over and asked if I was okay. I was like... erm... I guess so. Thinking who is this man? Turns out he was an undercover police man. He told me the men we were with were "morrocs" (does this mean they're from Morocco? I don't know) and he told them to leave and helped me move G. I went to get her some water and the police man said I had to call her host family because we didn't know her address. I told him I couldn't as it was her first week and I thought she might get sent home if she'd got into that state. Long story short, I ended up calling her brother in Poland at 4.30am (5.30am Polish time?) and he had to contact their dad and text me the address. By this point G was pretty much passed out and the police man called an ambulance and we ended up miles out of town at the nearest hospital. I just hung around while they did whatever they do with drunk people and finally at around 6am we were allowed to get a taxi home. I managed pretty good Spanish. I think I did anyway, but maybe my drunken Spanish isn't as good as I think it is. By the time we'd dropped G at hers and I'd stumbled back to mine it was about 7am. Luckily "my" family were away so no explaining had to be done. G sent me a message the next day saying I was her "angel" haha. Always the good samaritan.

The next day I dragged myself out of bed and went to the beach with J, the English au pair I met. We chilled on the beach and then went to watch the gay pride parade which was so much fun! Such a good atmosphere. It was so hot though and I was hungover so after about half an hour we headed off for some food then back to the beach. It was actually a really good day despite the lingering hangover. I got home around 8.30 and just chilled in the house. It was soo good to have a break from the family for a bit. On the Sunday I just had a lie in, went to the supermarket and met up with M, an American au pair for a couple of beers. I'd left the family a note saying what time I'd be home, but when I got back they were like... oh.. we didn't cook for you because we didn't know when you'd get back and seemed a bit pissed off. I left a note though and it's not like they'd told me when they'd be home. I felt bad anyway, so told them I'd already eaten and went to bed hungry.

This weeks been a mix of good and bad. The children are literally driving me INSANE. They're so nice sometimes, then so whiny, loud, annoying, rude etc etc other times. The older girl keeps saying she won't eat because "I no like" even though the day before she told me it was her fave food... And there were tears about having to spend the afternoon with me to do English. Way to make me feel wanted. They keep not telling me whats going on too and I can't cope with it. On Monday morning I told the mum I have to go home early because I have to do something for uni. I feel bad for not telling the truth, but I'd basically be insulting them if I did. So I go home a week today. In fact this time next week I'll be at home. Hopefully about to eat some tasty food and sleep in my double bed. I'm so so sad to be leaving the town. I've met some really cool people and I absolutely love the place. But the work isn't fun and living with someone else's family is too hard. I need my independence back.

Aside from the work/leaving early issues. I had a nice week. My uncle came over from England on Tuesday so I've been out for tea every night and shown him the town and things. He loves it here too and is already talking about getting an apartment/living here. We had some amaaazing food at this place called the Beach House. I had a seafood hot pot and it was SO good. Yum. Beats soggy green beans. Lots of frozen yoghurt too. Love it. On Thursday after a meal with my uncle I went to meet some of the people I met on Friday. We chilled in an outdoor bar for a bit and had some drinks, then went to this little jazz night. Jazz is not my thing at all but the company was good. There was only four of us. A guy I think in his 40's who's a little weird/inappropriate but not bad, a guy in his 30's who's an English teacher here and M, the American au pair. I got pretty drunk. The guys were buying all our drinks and we ended up in this little bar/club we went to on Friday. We were the only ones in there and we were talking to the reallyyy camp owner. He was a lot of fun. It was a good night and so nice to do something different.

My uncle left this morning, we went for a drink and then I took him to the train station. Came home for a nap and headed to the beach for a couple of hours. I came home expecting the family to be back from buying a new apartment (they have SO many houses!) but they weren't. Had a shower. Still no sign. Went to the shop. Still nothing. I was STARVING and didn't know if they were coming back for food so ended up making some pasta. I know they don't need to tell me their plans but I tell them roughly when I'll be home etc, surely they should tell me too?

Never mind. 6 days to go. I'm so excited to get back to my home comforts and freedom, but so sad to be leaving Spain. I'm going to crack on with my TEFL course and hopefully be back in a few months. Unless I change my mind which is a common occurrence.

Now it's written down my week sounds a bit uninteresting, but I've had a lot of fun and met a lot of people. If I could have my life here minus the work and living arrangements, I'd love it! I don't mind working, but au pairing is just not for me.


Friday, 14 June 2013

Ups, downs and english food

This time yesterday I was writing a post about being sure I wanted to go home. Right now, I'm excited about going out for drinks tonight and a weekend of being pretty much home alone as the family are going away.

I spent my morning drinking Koppaberg on the beach with another au pair I met and this afternoon in the pool with the older girl. I'm planning on going to the newly discovered English shop to buy beans and pesto (FINALLY something with flavor!) and probably everything else in the shop. Chocolate, crisps, coke... So much for healthy eating... Would it be sad to buy a couple of Estrella cans to drink before I go out? I know I'm alone but yummy dinner on the terrace with a cold beer sounds too good.

So today things are good. Apart from the sun burnt shoulders and forehead.. But I'll forget about that. I'll forget even more when I've filled up on some much needed alcohol.

It's Gay Pride here this weekend too and there's loads going on. There's a massive stage set up on the sea front and tomorrow there's a parade in the afternoon. Excited!

Five weeks tomorrow until home time. On Sunday I can say 4 weeks on 6 days. I can cope with that. I think.

I need to think about what I'll do when I get home. Am I going to do a TEFL course and go away? Or just get a job and hang around in England? I have no idea. How am I supposed to figure it out?

Writing about food has made me hungry. I might have to go to the shop over the road first, I might be able to get Spanish versions of beans and pesto there instead of paying extra for English brands. Is 5pm too early to have my tea? In England, not so much. In Spain, definitely yes. I have a horrible crazing for a kebab with loads of garlic mayo. YUM. Just the little issue of being a vegetarian. Do Spanish people go for post night out takeaways? I could so eat a pizza...


Tuesday, 11 June 2013


I went into Barcelona yesterday. It's such an easy journey, I'll definitely be going again soon. We only went to take the older girl to the orthodontist (she's only 8, isn't that really early to be getting a brace?) so I didn't get much chance to explore this time.

Yesterday I was like... Time is going fast, I can definitely cope with another 5 and a half weeks here. This morning, not so much. I was on Facebook and saw that one of my best friends is home from uni and I want to be there too! Instead I'm here, on my own, bored... I guess I have the sun though. 38 days to go.

I'm sad that I'm counting down the days. I knew this would happen. I plan things and get all excited, but still find myself ending up counting down until the end. I keep thinking about how excited I'm going to feel when I get on the plane home. Eeee can't wait. 5 weeks 4 days. By Saturday it will be 4 weeks and 6 days. I just need to remember that time will pass. I can do it, right?

This weekend I want to stay in the town, I'm supposed to be going for drinks on Friday (FINALLY A SOCIAL EVENT!) and an au pair from the next village has asked if I want to meet up on Saturday. But the family want to go to their house in the country. How can I get out of it? It's also Gay Pride Festival and I want to see the parades etc!

Oh life. It's such a strange thing. I wonder if I will ever be content with the speed it's going and what I am doing with it.


Sunday, 9 June 2013

Party Wear

The children have just left to go to a party on the beach and oh my god, their dresses were "grown up" to put it nicely. They were really nice... but more appropriate for an 18 year old going clubbing. Super short, halterneck and seriously low cut. Maybe I'm just being a bit prudish or maybe English styles are different but it's not what I would choose to put children in. But hey, it's not my place to judge.

Is it normal for children to cry a million times a day? This morning it was because the little one had bubble gum and the older one couldn't have any because she has a brace. Stomp stomp, shout shout. I'm sure there wasn't this much drama in my house when me and my brothers were younger.

It is now officially less than 6 weeks until I go home. 40 days. Can I do it? I flip between being like this is easyyy to thinking I want to go home tomorrow. But I actually cant, even if I wanted to because my brother is using my room at home while I'm away so I have to stay. The countdown timer on my phone is ticking away nicely. Slowly... but it's going down. I keep looking at planes and thinking how excited I'll be when it's finally my time to go hooooome. I think if I had more of a social like I wouldn't miss it so much, but because my life here revolves around walking around aimlessly and looking after children it makes me miss my social life at home.

I should be enjoying this. Hardly any responsibilities and loads of time to sit in the sun. I do like it, but it gets a bit lonely. Where are all the other au pairs? People here are LOADED, surely there must be more people with au pairs?!


Saturday, 8 June 2013

I am a stalker.

So after my chat with the attractive Spanish man, I appear to have turned into a stalker.

Yesterday wasn't so bad, but today I have walked past the place he works 5 times. I had to stop myself wandering past all evening. I saw him, but he had disappeared before I got there (hiding?) so I just kept walking. I don't even know why. He isn't some amazing god or anything, just a nice friendly guy. It must be my lack of male attention recently making me crazy.

Speaking of male attention, one of my fellow "spinsters" has pretty much got herself a boyfriend. HOW COULD SHE!? She knows she has to stay single with me. I know it's only a matter of time until I'm the last one in the group without one. Depressing. But what am I supposed to do? I either don't attract anyone, or I find myself in situations with people who already have girlfriends which 1. makes me a very bad person and 2. never ends well. When will it be my turn to find someone nice?

Well that definitely makes me sound like a desperate man obsessed stalker. Which I'm not. Honestly. I just get sick of other peoples happy stories when I'm about as single as you can get. Hello Bridget Jones.

Today has been okay. The family went out for the day so I've been alone all day and it's been nice. This morning I went on a stamp and postbox hunt, then went to the beach after lunch, out for a stalk/walk this evening and made my own food (pasta without half a bottle of olive oil, YAY) and I'm going to have a shower and watch a film or something soon.

I like the "me" time and relaxing, but what I really want right now is a crazy Spanish night out. I want to drink beer and dance on tables. But I'm a loner so that ain't gonna happen. I've spoken to another girl who is coming to be an au pair on Monday, maybe she will want to go crazy with me. I hope so. Otherwise I'm going to end up table dancing alone.


Friday, 7 June 2013

A Plan?

Okay. I may have come up with a plan. Although maybe not. But at the moment, the plan is...

Go home in July, find a bar job or something easy like that, and do a TELF course. Save save save until after xmas and then look into English teaching jobs in Valencia or somewhere else in Spain.

As sad as it is, the more I think about the job in Barcelona, the more I think it isn't right for me. I don't think I could live with a host family for a year. The family I'm living with now are so nice and I'm free to do what I want, but I couldn't do it for a long time. I need my freedom and independence. The worst thing is having to tell everyone that actually, I'm not moving to Spain in September. I'll have to deal with all the questions and sympathetic "Oh but you were SO excited..." comments. Yes, I know I was, but things change.

Is this new plan a good idea? Or do I still want to just stay at home and get on with life? SOMEONE HELP ME DECIDE!

I need to speak to my mum or dad. They usually help. But my mum is moving house today and is super stressed and my dad is on holiday, so neither are much use right now. I literally go in circles. But this is probably the best plan.. I think..

I get stressed that I'm nearly 23 and have no idea where I want to go with my life. And then I think that by the time I'm 26/27 I want to be with a serious boyfriend/fiance, be thinking about houses and children and know what I'm doing with life. That's 4/5 years. What am I doing? Stress. Right now I'm counting down the days until I get home, where I'll be living with my mum and her new partner, unemployed, carless, most of my friends aren't coming back to my city after uni and with no idea what to do.

Home > bar job > TEFL course > save up > come back to Spain in January? Yes? No?

What if I spend £350 on the TEFL course and then don't use it? I guess it's only money... But it's not like I'm rolling in it. Hmmm. Decisions.

I did say to myself I would let myself bum around until I'm 25 so even if I didn't go until January, I would still have over a year and a half to spend teaching somewhere.

Oh I don't know. I'm useless with decisions at the moment.


Thursday, 6 June 2013


The weather is so good! Around 23 degrees so not too hot and not a cloud in the sky :)

I've not had much to write about this week. It's not been bad, just a bit uneventful. Monday was the usual walk before picking up the girls for lunch, afternoon wandering in the town, evening English time with the older girl in the pool. Tuesday, I had the afternoon free so went to the beach and yesterday we went to a nearby city to some retail event thing. It was loads of different designer brands and they all had pop up shops in this old industrial area. Bit weird and a bit boring. I bought a dress, top and necklace but apart from that it was a bit dull. Last night I went in the pool for more English time with the older girl and just relaxed this morning and went to the beach this afternoon.

As I was walking to the school at lunch time this guy shouted "Que tal?" after me in the street and walked after me. I stopped and had a chat in English. He was pretty decent looking. I couldn't tell if he was flirting or just wanted a chat. He was asking if I lived here now (does that mean he's seen me walk past where he works? I go that way nearly every day...) how old I was (said goood, when I said 22) and said "see you" when I left. Hmm. Maybe it's just the lack of male attention or maybe he was a bit interested. I don't know. I'll be taking a walk that way again soon.

Still so up and down about the Barcelona job. Really don't know what to do. Another guy replied to my message about it and said around 30 people got sent home in the first month last year for going out too much. WHAT?! I don't want to go out everyday, but a couple of times a week isn't unreasonable is it?

Ohhhh I don't know. I need someone to make the decision for me. It's too hard.

43 days until home time. 11 days until my uncle gets here for 4 days. 32 days until my friend gets to Spain.

Another au pair that messaged me arrives on Monday so hopefully I'll be meeting up with her next week. I just want some social events to keep me occupied and I'm sure I'll be fine.

Oh, and the dad announced yesterday they might be going to their house in the Pyrenees a week on Saturday where they walk. FOR 6 HOURS. I like a nice stroll, but hiking for half a day? No thanks. For a start, the most sensible shoes I have are converse and they're hardly hiking material... Already thinking of a way to get out of going.

I thought I was tanning, but apparently I am red. I don't think I'm burnt, I just have naturally quite a red skin tone. Lovely.


Sunday, 2 June 2013


Yesterday was probably the best day I've had so far. I got up, chilled for a bit and then we took the girls to paint flowers to put on the gates of the city hall for the Corpus Christi fesival. That bit was a bit boring, I kept watching all these children bumbling around with paint brushes and all I could think was I'm wearing a white dress.. they better not come near me. I escaped unpainted and we went to the beach. The family I work for are members of the nautical club so I can use the changing rooms, showers, bar etc right on the beach. To be honest, I'd be pretty happy just roughing it and using the normal beach but I can't complain. So we had a couple of hours on the beach, most of the time I spent sunbathing but then went in the sea for a bit with the older girl. We came home and had a late lunch, shower and a nap and then went out to watch this weird parade with some giants. Never seen anything like it and I actually thought it was pretty creepy :/ but the children enjoyed it. We hung around on the street for aaages with the family and some of their friends, before going to a Southern California style restaurant. The menu was written in English and I liked the fact I could be independent in choosing my food. It gets a bit tiring having to have everything explained to me all the time. The meal went on for aaages and the children were all running round and being loud. I know kids do that, but I'm sure I was never quite that bad when I was little. We walked around the town a bit after. By this point I was SO tired and ready for bed but followed them round like a sheep for a bit. Literally crawled into bed when I got home and slept until 9.30 this morning (apart from waking up when the kids got up to go and put flowers on the street. This family is insanely loud).

No one was in when I woke up so I just had breakfast and went for a walk to see the flowers. I thought I'd see the family while I was out but didn't. I never really know what I'm supposed to do. Are my weekends free? Do they think I'm lazy when I don't get involved in stuff? I wish they had given me more information about what I actually have to do. I really don't feel like I DO anything. I just kind of follow them round occasionally speaking a bit of English. The only think I do that feels like I'm doing something is picking the girls up for lunch, dropping them back at school and the two evenings a week that I take the older girl out on my own. Is that enough? They pay me a decent about and really I only work about 8 hours a week...

I'm enjoying it here and hopefully meeting up with 2 other au pairs this afternoon. That didn't stop me from installing a countdown app on my phone. 47 days, 21 hours, 16 minutes and 8 seconds. 6 weeks and 6 days. I can do this!