Essay Hell

I can't do it. I really really can't. I've found things hard before but I literally don't know what I'm doing with this one. It's partly my own fault for not going to all the lectures and seminars but it's SO HARD. I've got just over 2 weeks to do it, I'm a third of the way through and I can't think of any more to write. Plus the book I need for it needs to be back in the library tomorrow as someone has a hold on it. Is it really bad to just keep it and pay the fine? Feel a bit bad on whoever needs it but I need it too!

On a happier note, I have 16 days left until I finish uni!! 3 years has flown by and I am so excited to never have to write an assignment again. 16 days till I finish also means it's not long until I have to pack up and move out of my uni house. I'm going to miss living with my friends, even if one of them does drive me crazy. I should really start sorting things out ready to pack but I don't know where to start with it all. I need to arrange for my dad to come and collect me and all my things as well. It's like the end of an era. No more lazy days lying in bed till the afternoon, no more student budgeting, no more crazy nights out 5 nights a week (I say this as if it's a regular thing. It's not. I'm boring now and don't go out so much but still, it's part of the student life...) and no more going to uni. It also means I have to leave my job as well. As much as I hate it sometimes, I do enjoy it. I've been there 2 years and met some people who will be friends for life (BFFL woo). It's been such a good job as well, if I don't feel like working one week I don't have to and the next week I could work 4 shifts. Super flexible!

It feels weird that I'm going to Spain in 3 and a bit weeks. I haven't spoken to the family since I booked my flights and I don't know if that is normal? I don't want to keep emailing them, but at the same time I don't want to not get in touch incase they think I don't want to go anymore or something. There's no instructions on how to do this! I need like a step by step guide to help me. Maybe after I've done it I could write one... I really can't wait now. I'm looking forward to a break from uni and I'm planning on trying to get really involved in their family life. Also so excited about September when I move to Spain properly. I keep looking at my suitcase and getting butterflies. Eeeee not long now :) The job makes me feel a bit nervous though. I've taught before and I was completely alone with a class of up to 30 Romanian children, so in theory the job in Spain should be simpler than that... but i'm still a bit worried about it all. I want to find out about other people doing the same thing as me. Apparently there is going to be around 150 people all going out at the same time. I'm hoping they're fun and I make some good friends. Also wan't to find out where I'll be living as well. It could be anywhere in Catalonia, I'd love to be in Barcelona though. There's a little bit of my that will be disappointed if I'm not, but I guess anywhere in Spain will be better than nowhere.

Looking forward to the day when I can blog about heading off to the airport, about to start my adventures. My mums taken the day off work to take me so I'm hoping we can do something nice like go for lunch before I head off. I'm secretly a bit scared of flying. Especially when I have to go alone. I've flown on my own 4 times but I like to have someone there to hold my hand. If I let myself think about it too much I feel like I might get a bit panicky so I'll stop now. Doesn't help that I had a dream last night that I was on a plane that kept having issues taking off and then when it finally did, we landed in the sea. SCARY TIMES.

Kisses